Thursday, May 21, 2015

Ireland


Tomorrow the small island nation is about to make history: Ireland is to hold the world's first national referendum on marriage equality.



Friday, May 22, inhabitants of the Emerald Isle will decide if they will become the first country on the planet to allow for same sex marriage through a popular vote. 



Voters will be choosing whether the Constitution of Ireland should be changed to extend civil marriage rights to same-sex couples. The proposed amendment to article 41 is the insertion of the line: “Marriage may be contracted in accordance with law by two persons without distinction as to their sex.” The Irish version reads: “Féadfaidh beirt, gan beann ar a ngnéas, conradh pósta a dhéanamh de réir dlí.”



If successful, gay people could begin marrying and close the 20 or so legal gaps left open by the civil partnerships that currently exist for LGBTQIA couples in Ireland. (Like having full parental rights for a child raised by two same sex couples and full adoption and surrogacy rights.)




The "Yes" vote camp has had numerous victories in the months leading up to tomorrow, including every single major polling source on line and on earth giving a firm nod of victory to the supporters of same sex marriage. The Taoisearch (Prime Minister), Enda Kenney, as well as the Irish President, Michael D Higgins, support a yes vote. An onslaught of Irish celebrities support a "Yes" vote as well, including most recently Bono and Colin Farrell.



Why is this such a significant day for marriage equality and the rights of LGBTQIA people? Because it's never been done before. Up until now, marriage equality has almost always been made the law of the land by one or several branches of the respected nation's governments: Either through judicial review, lawsuits, or government ruling. All 17 nations that currently have marriage equality on their books obtained it through the government versus the people.



Only in 2012 did the world see the first successful referendum of marriage equality here in the United States when Maryland, Maine, and Massachusetts voters voted in favor of allowing the freedom to marry. 



Now an entire country is challenging just how far a nation has come in acceptance. A victory in Ireland will send a ripple effect to not just everyone in Ireland, the UK, and Europe, but it will show the world that citizens can be and are tolerant of all people. Though not a member of the commonwealth, a "yes" victory would mean all of the UK and isles would have marriage equality and a victory would help enforce the message of equality to the commonwealth nations.

 

A "yes" victory means fewer and fewer English speaking countries banning marriage equality. Will a victory mean anything to the United States? Probably. We have a vast number of Irish and, specifically, Irish Catholic immigrants here that still keep ties with the old country. Often regarded as a deeply religious and conservatively Catholic nation, a victory would show the religious world, including the Vatican, that marriage equality and religion can coexist side by side. As our own Supreme Court debates and prepares to decide whether or not the freedom to marry is a constitutional right for all Americans, maybe a wink-wink, nudge-nudge from our friends across the pound might be what our 7 Catholic justices need to see in order to tip the scale of justice in our direction.

Until then, we wait with baited breath and a beacon of hope from our dear friends in Ireland. A land that will soon be known for its acceptance as the land of love, as well as its luck, and gorgeously green rolling hills.





Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Stop Slut Shaming!



One of Netflix' newest series, Scrotal Recall, (NOW renamed as LOVESICK) tackles head on with bells on an issue that makes most people very uncomfortable: Sexually Transmitted Illnesses. In the show, the main character Dylan learns that he has tested positive for chlamydia and feels the need to inform all of his past conquests about his ailment. Through hilarious flashbacks and scenes from the present, we see Dylan retrace his relationship steps that led him to getting "the clam" in the first place.



Sounds a little farcical, but this is a romantic comedy about doing what's right, living with your consequences, making the best out of messed up predicaments, and finding love in a myriad of uncomfortable situations. LOVESICK is, at times, gut wrenchingly hilarious, uneasy but relevant, cute, and a realistic testimony to living and loving in 2015.

I'm not completely sure about this, but I believe this could be the first series in history whose main plot revolves solely around someone obtaining an STI. Which makes me beg to ask the question: Why? Why is this the first TV show to really deal with what I'm assuming nearly all of us will go through at least once in our lives? Why don't more TV series deal with something so normal?



Maybe because we as a culture don't view sex and acquiring bugs as a result of sexual relations as "normal." Though it is my opinion that we should. I attribute this lack of coverage--pun intended--of sexually transmitted diseases to our puritanical-ism as a country and as a race. I didn't mention this before, but LOVESICK is a Scottish series set in Glasgow. I simply cannot imagine this show being set in America, and if it was, it could only take place in a city like New York: a metropolis that a lot of Americans haven't even ventured to and view as too wild, raw, and urban.

Why haven't more shows dealt with the trials and tribulations of having sex? If you dug deep enough, I bet you would find that a large majority of Americans have had at least one STD in their lives. Don't think so? How did all the millions of Americans suffering from cold and canker sores acquire these minor brands of the herpes virus? What about all the undetected HPV cases? According to two CDC reports released in 2013, 110 million Americans are living with an STD and 20 million new cases annually were expected to be reported. At a population of 360 million, that puts nearly 1 in three of us living with a previous transgression. With that many of us infected, should we really be branding anyone with a scarlet letter of disapproval?

In the words of my friend Jason:

"I'm sorry, these days If you haven't had an std--even just a small one once in your life--then you haven't lived. If you you haven't needed a shot in your ass to kill something off, then you're a loser."

Maybe this declaration is too extreme, but I happen to agree with him. If you haven't had at least one STI in your life, have you really lived? Why aren't we wearing our STDs with pride? Scoring a sexually transmitted ailment should almost be worn as a badge of honor: they state simply that we have LIVED. We've had sex. Probably with more than one person. But should that be held against us by society? And we can stop pretending only those who are reckless get into sexploits. We are all human and homosapians are naturally designed to have sex and enjoy it.



I guarantee we have all put ourselves in danger of acquiring an STI. We've all made out with someone new without the slightest concern for how nasty our mouths are and how much bacteria just naturally hang out there. Oral sex? Forget about it. Mr. Dylan from LOVESICK could have just have easily caught chlamydia from going down on a girl as having intercourse sex with one. Herpes? Gonorrhea? Meningitis? All orally able to invade!

The CDC reports an estimated 4 million new cases of chlamydia every year. While the average cost of the pill or shot for treating chlamydia is only $15, the estimated cost of complications from chlamydia can be upwards of $2 billion. Of the 20 million newly infected with an STI, half of those cases are people between the ages of 15-25. The costs of treating that many people for the duration of their lives can be as much as $16 billion or more. Aren't we doing a disservice to the younger generation by not talking about sexually transmitted illnesses and their frequency? If we would stop pretending that we don't have sex and start informing the public more about STDs because we already know they're having sex, I guarantee those numbers would be significantly less.





Why do we act like sex and STIs are something so taboo? Isn't Blanche everyone's favourite Golden Girl? Samantha everyone's favourite "sinner" In The City? At least in my crowd, these two broads are revered. Why? Because they are so unabashedly real. Sexuality is a part of life and these woman are simply open about their lives under the sheets. And on the sheets. And in the bathroom. And on the kitchen table...We love these lustful larger-than-life ladies because we secretly wish we were these women and could live out our sex lives more openly.



So stop the slut shaming. I'm not telling you to run out and go get an STI--I will always advocate for safe sex and to always get tested. But the reality is nothing in life is really that safe: Sex and relationships the least of all. Halt the judgement against your friends and yourself for craving an intimate connection with another human being. And start living. The sooner, the better.

But you might want to bring a condom.