Shine bright like a DIAMOND

Hey gang-

Hope all is well with everyone.

So I went into the lgbt center to begin orientation to receive counseling. Yes, counseling- as in one on one with a therapist about my problems. I've had some depressed moments lately, and I thought it was high time I did something about it. I've never seen a shrink or psychologist in my life but I have always said that anyone could use a third party to talk about what troubles them.

Isn't recognizing that you have a problem in the first place the first step to getting better?

Part of what has always upset me in my life is my lack of really feeling like I fit in. Anywhere. I'm always questioning where I belong or in what group or setting I actually mesh with. How come more people don't stand beside me with my thoughts and convictions? I am very opinionated, and as a result, life in Koelenland can seem very isolated.

And my friend gave me the best advice/wisdom. He said:

"Koelen, the fact is, you really don't fit in. You aren't 'normal'. You are different. That's what makes you special. You always want people to agree with you, and the fact is: people rarely agree with you. But just because people don't agree with you, doesn't mean you aren't right. You're just polarizing. You make people think. Some of the greatest minds ever were the same way: no one agreed with them at the time; yet, their outlook on life was so polarizing that it made people re-evaluate their own thoughts and beliefs. So don't change or feel a need to fit in, because you probably won't. And there's nothing wrong with that. That's why we love you. Because you are you."


It is sometimes hard to remember who we are and what we are doing here. My advice? Shine on! Shine bright like a diamond and screw the nay sayers. The people who matter are the ones who appreciate you for you.

~MORNING SEX~

I mean, I love sex, and anytime I can get it is #winning in my eyes.

But the mornings? (Granted that's when us guys are UP!) I just don't feel that sexy in the mornings.

7 Sins of MORNING SEX:



1. Bed hair. 'Nuff said...

2. I've got eye crusties in my eyes...

3. I most likely would have taken my contacts out. So unless I'm wearing my librarian marm glasses, then I'm blinder than Hellen Keller in a cave...

4. Morning breath...

5. I always take forever to wake up...so I'm really only about as conscious as my bed table...

6. I sweat worse than a wanton whore at Christmas in my sleep...so who knows if I'm smelling like a Parisian gym or not...

7. And typically I feel all bloated and dirty. Sleep in Koelen Land is serious business! It ain't pretty!...




Ugh I just feel gross in the mornings. I try not to let my inner Bree van der Kamp out and let all of that obsessing ruin a good morning romp...

But can't we fuck at night like normal folks?

Someone come slap the fuck outta me now and tell me to shut up about my #firstworldproblems!

NObamacare

Here is a perfect analogy of the way I feel about Obamacare and the "universal" "Affordable" Healthcare Act:


Yes. It is a step. But I'd've rather they built stairs that are gonna last, made by carpenters from both sides, than rickedy stairs that will collapse in 10 years- slapped together just so we could say we were helping the community by installing stairs for everyone, and constructed just to pay back the carpenters who gave you deciding power in the first place.

(Leaving 30+ million Americans- including myself: who will opt out and pay the penalty as it is all I can "afford"- uncovered is not universal health coverage. And certainly not when it benefits the record breaking profitable machines that are insurance companies in the US)

http://sacramento.cbslocal.com/2013/08/29/covered-california-spreading-word-answering-questions-about-affordable-care-act/

Music is my hot hot SEX

Sorry I haven't written in a minute kids. I have been emotionally and mentally under the weather and have been feeling quite lost these days.

I've lived in LA off and on 10 years now and still am trying to find the friend group/support system that I have always wanted. It's very easy to get down and feel lonely in the city of Angels because everyone is too busy for anybody unless they feel like they are getting something out of the situation.

Today I saw Katy Perry's new video for her single "Roar" and highly enjoyed it. I may not really like her music that much or respect her that much, but I highly value pop stars that put so much emphasis in self empowerment.

Hence why I love Kylie Minogue so much. Kylie's music is what one friend called "bubble gum pop". If that means music you can feel good about and dance to at any point in the day to lift your spirits, then maybe it is bubble gum pop.

Her music is more than that to me though: it is also self-empowering. She never sings about hardships or political stuff: it's always "Get outta my way" because "I Believe in you". "Can't get you outta my head" because you're "spinning around" so much you're making "all the lovers" feel like they are living with a "fever" or traveling "light years" through space.

I'm a writer and lyricist, so wordplay is very important to me. With lyrics like:

"Can you hear me? I'm connecting with you can you feel me? I'd do anything to have you near me. I was wondering: will you reach me?"

"Put your hands up if you feel in love!"

"It won't be long now: BREATHE!"

"It's not the end of the world. It's just the start of me and you!"

"Skip a beat and move with my body. SLOW"

"Push me to the brim, and you fill me to the brink. I can't function. I CAN'T THINK!"
or: "The way I feel about you's too much!"

"I don't believe you know me, although you know my name. I don't believe the thoughts I have are only mine to blame." or even "The joker's always smiling in every hand that's dealt, I don't believe that when you die your presence isn't felt."

"Every heartbeat, babe, is the soundtrack to your life!"

Or:

"And everything went from wrong to right. The stars came out and filled up the sky. The music you were playin' really blew my mind. It was love at first sight!"

Kylie's always singing about love and it's endless possibilities. Maybe that's why I love her: she makes me feel like finding love is an inevitability rather than something only left to select people. Either way, Kyle's music has always had my heart.

Love you, Kylie Minogue, and I hope you make records until you are 80!!!

Music has always held my heart. I have been so down these last few days and the music in my life is what keeps me ticking. It is very safe to say that without music, I wouldn't be here right now.

Why OBAMA, WHY?

I'm so sick of über liberals thinking that President Obama is perfect. He is a man, therefore, he is anything but PERFECT.

In 2008, the then Presidential Candidate Barak Obama made promises to leave medical marijuana laws in place in states like California and the other 23 states that have medical marijuana laws on the books. He promised, if elected president, that he would not use his agencies and raid our growers and dispensaries of marijuana. Soon after becoming president, Obama made a 180 and instructed his Department of Justice to start raiding marijuana dispensaries across the country.

A promise is a promise. Breaking that promise in 23 states at least 10 times is not an accident nor "getting all the departments in line." He made that promise to us liberals so we would further back him and then pulled away from his promises- to appease a middle ground that will never support him 100%- as soon as he got elected.

Yes I know the Repubs suck, but so do the Dems. Not every single action made by a human being is defendable. NOT EVERYTHING REPUBLICANS DO IS BAD AND YES, THE PRESIDENT HAS LIED and CHEATED just like every politician. Monsanto, party of one? Libya? Syria? Bueller?!?

He lied, and now he's slowly backpeddling because he is realizing what every president since Carter has realized: The war on drugs is losing. LOTS of money is being lost. Think about how much money his DOJ costs us every time he raids a slew of dispensaries here in California. This new ruling only effects Colorado and Washington.

His cartels of Justice Department storm troopers are basically doing what a brief published today is promising NOT TO DO:

According to the guidance, DOJ will still prosecute individuals or entities to prevent:


revenue from the sale of marijuana from going to criminal enterprises, gangs and cartels;
the diversion of marijuana from states where it is legal under state law in some form to other states...

You can read the whole brief here:

http://www.docstoc.com/docs/160507622/DAGMemo8-29-13

By criminalizing state laws that protect patients, their rights, and the rights of consumers and producers to participate in a capitalist economy, all Obama is really doing is putting the drugs and revenues back in the hands of criminals


It's my constitutional right and duty in my mind to question our leadership. I just dont understand people who shove all of his dirty antics under the mat and still think he is the great white hope of a president. He's been decent. Thats all. Better than Bush, better than McCain or Romney woulda been, but still just very decent.

ALPHABEAT

Today is a new dawn, a new day, and I'm feeling good.

One of the single most important things to me in my life is MUSIC. I listen to music all of the time. I love singing, I love dancing, and I love music wrapping up like blanket of warmth in my ears.

One of my absolute favouritist touring bands of today is the Danish band ALPHABEAT.

They are super '80's poptastic and I just love them. It's a 6 member band with 2 lead singers: a guy and a girl. So the harmonies and lyrics are always simple but really catchy.

If you've never heard them before, I'm posting a few links to their vids:

"Fascination" is their most popular song. It's rare to find a European that has not heard "Fascination":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QvD6maGRh7c

One of my personal favs is "Heat Wave". I can dance the shit outta this song at any turn.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dB01PTZNpBc

I hope you enjoy! Love them!

#ALPHABEAT

Closure

Today I thought I was going to cut ties with someone that I have recently been seeing.

This person and I started off great, but his job got so in the way of his life that he quit communicating with me.

My stance, the whole time, was "you make time for the people you love." Granted, we've only known each other for a little over a month, so I wouldn't say that we were 'in love' or anything, but the point remains.

In this digital age where so many options are available at our fingertips, is it really so hard to pick up the phone? To fire back a text in less than a days time response to the person who text you?

Because he wasn't communicating, and was only absent, I didn't know what to think. I just assumed that he wasn't man enough to tell me he was seeing someone else or man enough to tell me that he just wasn't that into me.

But the waiting and silence on his part took a tole on me. I started questioning how I could be so dumb as to let another asshole into my life who doesn't value me for me. What was wrong with me that made him lose interest so quickly? I shouldn't think this way, but guys hit a soft spot inside my heart and I have a problem not psycho analyzing everything that I did "wrong". I don't suffer from depression, but I do have the ability to take myself into a dark place in my head where I just blame myself for everything and question everything I do.

Maybe it's because I have been hurt in the past. Maybe it is because I grew up without a father throughout most of my youth....maybe it's just that I'm too hard on myself.



Anyway, today I was strong and went to confront him. He had some stuff of mine that I needed back, and all of a sudden starts immediately responding back to every text and with
diligence.

When I arrived, he asked me what was wrong. Probably because my energy could power a northern European city for a week.

I laid into him saying I'm sorry that we didn't work out. That I needed someone who communicates more. I told him how some of his texts made me feel like shit, feel worthless, and feel that I was second guessing myself.

I could see in his eyes that he was sorry. He said that it had nothing to do with me and everything to do with him. I could see he meant that too. In fact, I could see in his eyes that he still likes me.

When he walked me to my car, I told him that I was sorry we didn't work out. Told him I need someone who communicates more. He answered back that we could still work things out. That he would communicate more. That he just needed time...

Time is what got us here in the first place.

He said he was sorry for hurting me and stated that it had been a long time since he had dated anybody. I too said I hadnt dated anyone in a long time. I told him I hoped that I didn't come off as that annoying guy by texting too much, though I know I had not. He just shook his head and hugged me.

You see, I went there to end it all. I hadn't physically seen him in the flesh in more than 2 weeks and his vacant texting and not returning a few calls had led me to believe it was over.


Last night, my friend Louie and I were talking about what happens to those friends, family members, or lovers that were once so close in your life and are now gone? Are they just living their lives? Have they moved on? Were they somewhere in the world also munching on Taco Bell at 1 in the morning?

Had I just walked outta this guy's life, I probably would have partially blamed myself and I never understood what happened between us. Do I know now? Not really.

The closure I get from all of this is the fact that I am man enough to be able to address these issues with the guys I'm into. Yes, I haven't done that much dating recently, but one thing that tells me I'm ready to embrace someone in my life is the fact that I am open and able to honestly communicate my feelings to that person.

For now. I don't know what I'm going to do. Should I wait? Should I move on and forget about him? Time will tell. And the old adage rings true: It's better to have love then lost than to have never loved at all.

Land of Enchantment, indeed!

49 U.S. states have marriage laws on the books: whether in support of full equality or against it.

New Mexico has no marriage laws in their constitution with gender specifications....

Today a judge ruled that two counties in New Mexico must begin issuing marriage licenses in their state due to the state not having specific marriage laws.

Judge Alan Malott: "There is no benefit to the parties or the public interest in having this matter progress through a lengthy path of litigation while basic constitutional rights are being compromised or denied on a daily basis."

Read more: http://livewire.koat.com/Event/Live_Video_Couples_sue_for_same-sex_marriage_rights#ixzz2d7VKQnht

We might just have gotten a 14th state added to the list of states with full marriage equality!

#LUCKYNUMBER14?

http://livewire.koat.com/Event/Live_Video_Couples_sue_for_same-sex_marriage_rights

ANAL SEX: Who's having it, who's taking it, and who's loving it?

Yes, that's a picture of my ass.

Now that I've gotten your FULL attention, I want to talk to you about something serious:

ANAL SEX

Yes. I said it.

Booty sex has grown from being something of a taboo subject into something that more and more people are willing to talk about. The reasoning? More and more people are trying it... and I don't just mean us homos.

I've known for a while that straight men are into anal sex because of my girl friends admitting to me that they have tried it with their boyfriends. And come on...asses are hot.

Yes, that was my ass again. It's hot, right? lol.

How many times are asses sung about in songs? Praised, even?

"Baby Got Back" is probably the most known song from the 90's. PERIOD. What about the "Apple Bottom Jeans, Boots with the fur, Shawty got low" song? I just googled and there are 3 million, top 10 Butt Song lists online. Let's not forget "Bootylicious". Or "My Humps", "Shake Your Booty", "Fat Bottom Girls", and "The Thong Song", also come to mind when thinking about the REAR.

So obviously we are living in a society that accepts the beauty of a hot butt, and we can appreciate the esthetics of a hot ass...so why don't we actually talk about the booty and making love to it?

Why the taboo? Yes the bible says this and bible says that, but did the bible include enemas? Did the bible include cleaning yourself out?

I mean, it seems one of the biggest disses on anal sex is the poo factor:

Yes, we all shit. But unless you are a dog or seriously demented or into German Sheisse porn, NONE of us LIKE SHIT. SHIT stinks. SHIT is gross. SHIT IS SHIT! TAKE CARE OF IT!

Use an enema. Use a fleet. Use your garden hose or shower stream...just clean it out! (Hence why gay men always shower: we don't like to get dirty when getting dirrrrty, Xtina.)

Now that all that SHIT has been metaphorically washed away, why are we still not more open about anal sex?

God put nerve endings in your anal cavity for a reason, my dears.

God made your anal cavity so well that it is able to expand and contract to be able to process digestion but also process how great it feels to take something in your butt.

And if you really want to talk anatomy, both men and women have G spots. For men, it happens to be in the butt. So basically men were biologically designed to get anally stimulated to achieve the maximum amount of orgasm and pleasure.

Really, I think it is a societal stigma placed on men that has them fearing trying anal sex. Our society teaches us that men are supposed to be the dominate ones doing the penetrating. Yet, I don't think there is anything submissive about getting fucked in the ass.

Unless you are naturally submissive, you can be just as dominate with a toy, penis, or phallic object in your back side as you can being on the other end of the stick. Pun intended. Pleasure is pleasure. I have lots of girlfriends that I consider to be the dominate partner in their relationships and that "role" often translates into the bedroom, too, be it in the same "role" or opposite. Point is, just because you like to get penetrated in the ass, it doesn't make you less of a man.

Maybe if our society didn't put as much pressure as we do on men to be this archetype of a dominate, emotionless being, there wouldn't be such a stigma against sexual liberation in regards to anal sex. In my mind, all men, gay or straight, should be more versatile. In my mind, anal sex makes a man a better sexual partner because he now knows what it's like to feel someone else inside of him. To really feel the connection that we have perceived only women could feel. Men have a unique position in this world in that we can enjoy sex as the "giver" or "taker". The fucker or fuckee.

I am a versatile gay man, meaning I have no preference when it comes to having anal sex with my lovers. I came to realize a very long time ago that either penetrating a guy's ass or getting mine penetrated feels amazing and having the option of versatility makes for more options in the bedroom.

I don't fall into the stereotype of "TOP" or "BOTTOM" because I am simply both.

I've asked my gay guy friends this upcoming question and 100% of them answered the same way:

"You say you are strictly a top or strictly a bottom, well what happens when the man of your dreams walks in the door and he considers himself to be the opposite sexual role that you have proclaimed yourself to be?"

"Would you not pursue it?"

Of course they all answer that they would pursue it and would then go forth with a more open mind. Obviously there are those that strictly prefer one role or another, but again, I feel like they are truly limiting themselves from having the fullest sex life they could have.

If I had to put my two cents in the jar, I would say most gay men are actually versatile. I would say more men are curious about anal sex than actually realized. I would say more women have tried it than actually mentioned at the cocktail hour. Basically, I would say that anal sex feels great and the more people that realize this, the more we as a society will accept it and be able to talk about anal sex in a more open manner.


In conclusion, I will say this: go have anal sex.

A lot of us, whether willing to talk about it or not, have already tried anal sex. And loved it. We realized a long time ago that our body is a temple:

just some places on our bodies are more "holy" than the others...

and yes, that's my butt. again. you're welcome.

Thank you Jesus for Gatorade

Yes.

Weho Pickup Bus

From one of my short stories:

Here is snidbit of "Get Me to the Parthenon on Time!", one of my 16 short stories in my upcoming book:

16

We landed in Athens and my mom was feeling the jet lag.

My ass, on the other hand, had taken two sleeping pills, ate a pot brownie, had a glass of red, and downed a valium on the plane. So, after sleeping the entire flight, I was feeling alive and powerful! Like a god of olden times: Zeus! (Well, maybe more like Apollo…or maybe even more like Aphrodite…yet still oh so powerful, damnit!)

I like Crazy

I like crazy. I dig crazy. I get crazy. Crazy loves company!

I'm only Happy when it Rains!

The rain in LA falls mostly on le gays...


Love waking up to see West Hollywood is getting rained on! In the summer, no less!

I'm only happy when it rains!

Never Get Burned Tanning Again!

I love me some sunshine!

Some of that vitamin D deliciousness always puts a smile on my face and a dark shade on my body. (Which complements my stunning blue eyes!)

I love the sun, but you gotta know how to protect yourself. Here's what I do and how I haven't had a bad sunburn in 10 years!

1. Don't go out at high noon- wait until later or don't drink so much the night before so you can lay out in the morning!

2. Wear sunscreen! Sounds like I'm stating the obvious, but you don't have to go overboard with SPF 1000. A good 15-30 will suffice. This is mostly to prevent premature wrinkling so you don't look like an old bitch or petrified mummy by 40.

4. Drink lots of water before, after, and while laying out.

3. Set an alarm on your phone so you don't fall asleep and wake up Kentucky Fried Chicken

4. Shower immediately after laying out. In fact, swim while laying out. Then shower at least 2 times after tanning before you go to bed that night.

5. Drink more water.

6. Moisturize moisturize moisturize! Use as much lotion or moisturizer as you want. As many times as you want. you want to feel like the Gulf of Mexico after a British Petroleum oil spill! So greasy you could float!

Aloe is natural, amazing, and can be free if you grow it! Either way, hydrate the fuck outta your skin like Katrina on N'Orleans!

7. Get plenty of sleep!

8. Drink more water!

My secret is simple: the more you maximize absolute hydration back to your skin cells, you are replenishing them with nutrients lost/depleted by the sun.

Attack those cells and let 'em know you mean business! You are not gonna get a sunburn!

Have a safe and fun Friday, bitches!!!

Do everything I would do!

Life is no Game of Thrones

So I've been addicted to Game of Thrones as of late.

One thing I have gathered from this show is this:

Fuck, I would not have wanted to live back in Medieval times!

I mean, what the hell would you really have to look forward to? Wars, famine, or plagues? Being taken as a slave? Being raped and murdered or forced into a life you didn't choose for yourself?

I mean, crossing the street or doing something as remedial as venturing into the woods could get you killed!

A lot of bloodshed, gore, and little hope for happiness- other than getting your dick off- seemed to be daily life for people. I know that Game of Thrones is fictional, but I gotta believe all the jousting, fighting, bleeding, whoring, and mischief went on back then similarly as it is portrayed on the show. Probably worse.

Who knows how bad life could have gotten for us gays?

...I couldn't imagine what it would have been like to've lived back then!

Nowadays, a difficult aspect of life is dealing with a shitty boss or looking for work. Having a head cold or trying to lose weight. Just barely trying to survive is hardly a construct of life as we know it, especially not in the U.S.

Yes, there are still wars, famine, whoring, raping, etc going on, but at least it's not such a daily aspect of our lives that our children have to bare witness to it all on the daily.

Unless their parents let them watch youtube or Game of Thrones....

My cousin's Florida wedding

Hello from Florida. I just witnessed my 2nd cousin's wedding and it was beautiful.

I can't believe I finally live in a U. S. state where marriage equality is legal.

Marriage is such a fundamental part of growing up and our society that I, too, have taken it for granted. But I'm blessed.

Cheers to marriage! Cheers to Floridia! (Tho, get with it and join Cali in marriage equality reform!)

Life is so short. It's time we all start living it like we wanna be here! Love is love!

It's time to Boycott the 2014 Olympic Games

According to sources with the AP, Huffington Post, and others, Russia plans to uphold its law banning anything gay in their country, including lgbt athletes and friends, during the 2014 Olympics in Sochi, Russia. Time to boycott the 2014 Olympics, my friends.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/30/russia-anti-gay-olympic-games-sochi_n_3676311.html

Meet the newest addition to my family!

Ladies and Gentlemen-

Please meet the newest addition to my family:

The Mantis.

I was walking to work and there was a yard sale going on. I walked by and saw the Mantis just sitting there and asked how much the bike was for.

The man said, "How much you got?"

"$22," I said, looking in my wallet.

"SOLD!" he said. Turns out this yard sale helps raise money for this young kid, Jacob Topchui, who is fighting Osteosarcoma. When I found that out, I asked the man if he was sure that he wanted to let the bike go for so cheap. Meaning that I wouldn't mind it if he wanted to hold off on selling me the bike to make more money for the cause. He handed me the flyer and told me to like their group on facebook.

"Help us spread the word, and the bike is yours!" He said.

So here I am, informing you of a way you can help, too:



https://www.facebook.com/tmtd6


The Mantis and I are going to have many adventures together!

Boycotting Latvian Vodka will do nothing to Russia

Dear West Hollywood/LGBT Community in the U.S.:

Boycotting Latvian vodka will do nothing to effect the economy or government of Russia.

Russia is run by a mob boss/dictator and the people are helpless but to comply or be killed. Attempting to hurt the economy will only put further wealth into the hands of the people that control and oppress the people of Russia.

But also, Latvia is not Russia. It is a completely different country altogether. Please educate yourselves...

... and do actual activism like writing the President of both the United states and the International Olympic committee and ask them to boycott the 2014 Olympics taking place in Russia. Now doing something like THAT might have an impact.

Why we gotta hate on one of our favourite vodkas made famous to us by Absolutely Fabulous?



Ironically Latvia's flag is a big fucking red and white equal sign....

Just when you thought it was safe to date in L.A. ...

Just when you thought it was safe to date in L.A......

Wait. Have I ever thought dating was healthy in Los Angeles? No.

Safe? Fuck no.

LALALAnd has long been a place where its citizens tend to be always looking over their shoulders at the greener grass on the other side of the fence.

For me, love in Los Angeles has been, in the recent words of the new Pet Shop Boys CD, a Bourgeois construct. Only the advanced, upper class folk of my town seem to be in the actual relationships that last. Only the most beautiful members of my town attract the pretty ones first. So where does that leave the other 97% of us?

No I'm not asking for us to Occupy L.A. romantically. (Whatever the fuck that means)

I'm asking for us...me...to take a leap of faith and get back into the game of love!

I'm freshly back from Europe with new ideals and ideas about life and love and the human spirit. Maybe having countless amount of people in Berlin and Prague show their complete compassion and love for me as a human/stranger has led me to now become a changed man. I'm now more open to actually believing that all people are really good inside. More open to the idea of meeting somebody to stand still with for a while.

Either way, one of the biggest lessons I brought back to LA is to be more open to possibilities. Life is short. Maybe dating in LA isn't that easy. Maybe I will have to kiss a lot of frogs to obtain my prince....

But isn't that what life is all about? Trial and error?

I'm dating again, Los Angeles. And this time with a more open heart and mind... Are you ready for this jelly?

Please Don't tear down the Berlin Wall

Dear Mr. Mayor-

PLEASE DON'T TEAR DOWN THIS WALL!

I write this to you not just as a Los Angeleno, a citizen of Berlin's sister city, but as a BERLINER!

Yes I said it: "ICH BIN EIN BERLINER!"

Because I too have been touched by the magic and enchantment of your city. One of the key factors of the magic in Berlin is the Wall that stands today as the East Side Gallery.

Berlin obviously has a tumultuous past. It's history is vast and it's stories are legendary. The East Side Gallery has become exactly that: A gallery. An exhibit portraying all the wrongs that Berlin has suffered. All the tragedy and the lives lost. But also of a victorious future filled with hope and equality for all man kind.

I first visited your Wall in November of 2012. I remember running my hands along the concrete and graffitied Wall. The energy there was indescribable. I felt a passion for life alongside horrors of human suffering. I felt anguish. But I felt hope. Love. Peace. I openly wept at the Wall and was beyond moved by the shear impact that it's imagery instilled in my head forever.

"As long as this scar of a wall is permitted to stand," Reagan once said. To many Berliners, I'm sure the Wall is a scar. It's rife with street art and graffiti and sits on a hotbed of real estate development. Right on the river Spree, I could see the Wall being torn down and replaced with modern architecture. Condos, perhaps.

But you see, I was so surrounded by hope and love when I was at the Wall in November that I too had to leave my mark. I saw some tourists take an ink pen and graffiti the Wall in small print. I wanted to do the same: leave my mark. Let the world know I had been there and seen and felt that incredible energy.

I asked the couple if I could borrow their pen. I had to be quick, so as not to get caught, but I really wanted to say something in line with the emotions I was feeling. Hope. Love. Aspirations of greatness. Tolerance. A Future. I remember pushing back some tears and writing this:

"Love One Another Always -AML, Koelen"

(AML stands for All My Luv.)

When I returned to Berlin for my second time in July of 2013, I was again surrounded by the magic in your city. Berliners and Germans aren't always known for being friendly, but Berlin welcomed me back with open, motherly arms and embraced me like I, too, was a Berliner. Each time I have visited your city I found the aforementioned stereotype to not be true at all. Berliners ARE a warm people. They are kind and considerate. They are welcoming. I had more strangers help me in my two weeks in Berlin than I have had in my entire life. Either my experiences are unique, or Berlin itself is changing. Berlin is embracing the world as the world embraces Berlin.

Everyday I road the U Bahn, I would cross the bridge at Warshauer Strasse and see the heart beat of my favorite city. The Wall stood sentinel, guarding the city and reminding us of it's past but telling us to look forward.

My last day in Berlin, I returned to the Wall in person, to once again feel what I had previously felt. I was saddened to see that the city is using the Wall as a new exhibit to showcase walls around the world and the division they cause between people. I know that these beautiful images were covering up street art and graffiti, but hasn't street art and graffiti become another trademark of Berlin?

You as Berliners have some of the best street art in the world. And you've embraced it in your murals and your graffiti. In that way every one is free to express themselves. Any single idea can be shouted from the rooftops or etched onto the side of a building. This is a far cry from your city's recent past.

It took a little breaking and entry and climbing over a fence, but I was able to use my photos of the Wall in November to find the exact place that I had graffitied it.

To my shock and pure amazement, my graffiti was still there! 8 months had past. New street art, new tags, and new paint had been thrown on the wall, yet someone (or many) had respected my message enough to leave it be. Sure, my segment looks like it is next to be torn down: it has a turbine in front of it and is surrounded by construction tools. Yet, there was my message clear as day:

Love One Another Always.

You see Mr. Mayor, Berliners…this is no ordinary Wall.

It has become what you have affectionately began to call it: The East Side Gallery. It is a giant, outdoor art exhibit. Unlike most art exhibits in the world, this one anyone can contribute to. Anyone can leave their mark on. Anyone is free to see it, touch it, absorb the air, and let it's majesty and energy set in.

What once stood as a divide is now one of the most visited places in all of Berlin. It is beyond a tourist destination: it is THE destination in Berlin.

The Berlin Wall…the East Side Gallery is now a beacon of hope that stands to let its citizens and visitors remember the past and embrace a future of peace.

So I say again.

Mr. Mayor and Berliners:

Please don't tear down this wall.


Koelen Andrews
koelenandrews@gmail.com
http://koelen.blogspot.com


(I have sent copies to the other mayors as well as the local newspapers in Berlin. I apologize for writing this in English. Mein Deutsch ist sehr schlecht.)

To Bicycle or NOT to Bicycle?...that is the question

One of my vows to myself after returning from Berlin and bicycling everywhere is I want to buy and learn to ride a bicycle better.

The problem is I live in Los Angeles. Literally 100% of my friends that bicycle in the City of Angels has been hit by a car while on their bicycles. My girl friend, just 4 days ago, tragically lost her boyfriend who died after being hit by a car while on his bicycle.

Hence, I'm not that keen on dying. I'm keen on living and bicycling the shit outta my city. Can I do it? Also, I don't want to spend a lot of money on a bike, so if anyone has any leads on a free bike or cheap one or one you are not using, then let me know...

Gotta love Southern Cali!

Life isn't always so hard in Southern California. Yesterday, I woke up with a feeling like I had no idea what I was going to do with my day. I had returned from Europe the day before and had knocked out all of the errands I was going to run.

When I saw that my friends were hiking Runyon Canyon, I decided to join. That evolved into filling up my day very quickly. Today is no exception.

I'm writing this moments before I get ready to pick up my friend Jenny in Culver City and head to the beach in Santa Monica. Yes, I often forget that there is a big, fat, fucking ocean right at my doorstep. And it is summer after all...

Tonight there is a gathering of the Los Angeles "chapter" of couchsurfing.com that I plan on attending at the HMS Bounty in Koreatown. Followed by karaoke in West Hollywood for my friend Tim's birthday and I've got myself a fully booked day in the city ofAngels.

Gotta love Southern Cali!

Queen Elizabeth II: UK Marriage Equality Official!!!

Queen Elizabeth II of the UK has given her approval of the marriage equality law!

We just got marriage equality in the UK. Germany, are you next?

http://www.france24.com/en/20130716-uk-parliament-legalises-same-sex-marriage-gay-england-wales

Missing Europa

So it is my first full day back in Los Angeles and I'm already missing Prague, but mostly BERLIN. I fell in love with Berlin while I was there and now have a desire to summer there every year from here on out, just like my friend Komisha. When you get Europe in your blood, it is hard to let go!

Ich liebe dich, Europa!

BERLIN

Sorry I haven't written in a while. But when you are in Berlin, there is hardly ever a point to sit down!

I absolutely love it here. Not just the partying and 24 hour life, but the Spree and laying out in the sun has taken up several of our days here. I love the summer in Europe.

Tomorrow, there are talks of me going to Prague. I'm desperate to travel and see the world, yet my time in my neu lieblings stadt is dwindling: I've only 8 days left in this city of dreams. I think I'm also scared to leave Berlin because of the social network I have here thanks to Irene's friends. That and I speak the language.

Well, if I can Berlin, then Prague shouldn't be as challenging. At this point on my 4th day in Berlin, anything is possible. Bring it on!